Wise Mister April

So, in my first post that's not about a fictional blimp. It's not completely removed though...

What follows is a quick roundup of all the crazy hijinx people of the internet have been up to today.

So, we started off early with the printing of newspapers

• The Sun revolutionised printing technology to bring us flavoured print
• Gillette made a shirt that neutralised all body odour
• The Telegraph reported on ferrets being used to run broadband cables to rural locations
• The Mail told us about the Jetpacks being issued to AA workers to get over the traffic.
• The Guardian had several in, including BMW offering different logos for different political affiliations 

The last 2-4 aren't up to much. 2 and 3 might as well just be real and 4's too ridiculous. I love 1 though. I want to be on the tube this morning and see people licking page 17 of The Sun. 5's just classy. Anyway, onto the internet:

• Touchnote revealed they'd teamed up with BAA to give you the option of a postcard of you body scan
• The iPad was actually just a prank
• The Waterloo and City line was going to be pedestrianised
• The Circle Line was going to be turned into a particle accelerator dubbed "The LHC 2"
• William Shakespeare became French
• A polar bear washed up on the Isle of Mull
• Jim Bowen is to open a Bullseye themed restaurant
• Gordon Brown released a book of speeches and got some new posters

There's some great stuff there but of course for yet another year, google wins

• The big one was that due to the fact Topeka in Kansas changed its name to Google in order to scrounge some free broadband (that bit's actually true) Google had to change its name to Topeka. It's pretty simple but I quite like it. Sort of plausible sounding. Topeka, Topeka Mail, Topeka Streetview.
• Google Wave notifications were to be sent in person
• Google Docs made a feature by which you could upload anything. Anything at all. For $0.10 a kg
• Chrome got sound effects designed to help you intergrate more fully with the web
• Picasa offered an option for life-sized cardboard cutouts
• Youtube reduced their bandwidth by providing text-based versions of all their videos, apparently saving them a dollar for every second of video watched or something

And best of all

• A Google Translate for Animals Android App, need I say more?

If you want any more info on any of them, use google, what am I your servant?

If you're lucky it'll still measure time in Hertz or "Shakes of a lamb's tail"